Posts Tagged ‘true stories’

Most of us would like to make … adjustments. We want to lose weight, get healthier, spend more time with our families, grow in our faith, explore new talents, give back to the community. But somehow we’re too busy, have too many responsibilities, are too set in our ways. Hey, it’s tough to change.

Bet Jeffrey Henderson felt that way, too.

The young African American grew up in what was then called South Central—a Los Angeles community synonymous with poverty, crime, drugs, and gangs. At the age when average middle-American kids were transitioning from JV to varsity sports, he was selling crack on street corners. And by 19, he was earning $35,000 a week.

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One of the cardinal sins of dreamstopping is pigeonholing: putting ourselves in a limited space and failing to see our other possibilities. Of course, if you were going to be pigeonholed, there are worse spaces to be boxed into than Hollywood movie star and sex symbol. That’s the space Hedy Lamarr occupied in the 1930s and 40s.

Lamarr was a stunning dark-haired Austrian-born actress who later became an American citizen. She captivated directors as a 19-year-old in the 1933 Czech film Ecstasy, and within a decade was capturing plum roles opposite Hollywood’s top leading men. Billed as “the most beautiful woman in the world,” she even wound up playing the ultimate Biblical seductress in director Cecil B. DeMille’s lavish 1949 production Samson and Delilah.

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My sister-in-law once told me she likes her anger because it makes her more productive. I knew exactly what she meant. My biggest achievements in life have come after someone told me I’d never make it and I got hoppin’ mad. “Really? Watch me.“

Though my last name is Roberts, I don’t know of any relation to famed horse whisperer Monty Roberts. But when it comes to our reactions to naysayers, his mother and I are kindred spirits. In his autobiography, The Man Who Listens to Horses, Roberts shared the first time he voiced his life dreams.

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We do what we have to do to get by.

History is filled with examples of people who unexpectedly triumphed while living that mantra—perhaps none so unlikely as Hessie Donahue.

As a young girl growing up in Worcester, Mass., Hessie loved going to boxing matches with her father. So maybe it was inevitable that when boxing instructor Charles Converse came to town in 1891, the 18-year-old would fall for him. They soon married and Charles opened a local boxing school.

Since she knew the sport well, her husband frequently asked Hessie to check out the boxers’ moves to ensure they weren’t making any mistakes. And sometimes, she’d even don the gloves and spar with Charles. It’s not as crazy as it sounds. At nearly six feet tall and about 160 pounds, Hessie could handle herself.

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What’s wrong with me? Am I crazy? Am I crazy? Am I crazy?

That’s been the lament of my week. How about you? Football historians will also recognize it as one of the most famous game calls in history.

In the 1920s, Graham McNamee became the world’s first broadcasting superstar, the first sports color commentator, the guy who covered everything from the play-by-play of the World Series to political conventions to Charles Lindbergh’s arrival in back New York after his transatlantic flight. But perhaps his most famous on-air moment came while calling the Rose Bowl on New Year’s Day, 1929.

The University of California Golden Bears were facing off against the Georgia Tech Yellow Jackets with the National Championship on the line. And the nation was listening. The teams were in a scoreless tie in the second when Tech running back Stumpy Thomason fumbled on his own 36. California center Roy Reigels, in on defense, recovered on the 30. All he had to do was fall on the ball, and the Golden Bears were within scoring range. But Riegels was determined to be the hero.

He scooped up the ball … and started to run … in the wrong direction.

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Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about decision-making. Make good decisions, take small but persistent steps in the right direction, and you can achieve amazing things. Make poor decisions, and your mountains seem to grow taller and more insurmountable each day.

Since the start of the year, I’ve been making poor decisions. Actually it’s more accurate to say I’ve been postponing decisions. But making no decision is really making a decision to do nothing—and that’s usually a poor choice. So my mountains have begun to seem … immovable.

Fortunately, those mountains are uniquely mine, and the only person my idleness has hurt is me. Now that I’ve chosen to do something, I can simply move forward with no real harm done.

But what if other lives were in the balance? What if your failure to act could cause irreparable harm?

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These days it seems some people will say almost anything to get to the top. Then having gotten to the top, they want to make sure everyone knows they’re Top Dog. They fly in private jets, ride in limos, keep their own hours, and never do anything they consider beneath them—unless compelled by subpoena.

But the most successful leaders understand what it means to walk their talk. Take NFL Hall of Fame football coach Chuck Noll.

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For many of us, the mountain we’re trying to move involves our own feelings of self-worth: Why am I here? And, as Lynyrd Skynyrd’s Ronnie Van Zant first sang nearly four decades ago: “If I leave here tomorrow, would you still remember me?”

Van Zant’s death in a 1977 plane crash gave answer to the eternal question of the “Free Bird” lyric: Yes, we remember—because of the music. But what about those who lack Van Zant’s gifts? Will anyone notice they were here?

That’s what plagued factory worker Ken Swyers.

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It’s said that every journey begins with a single step. My problem is that once I take those monumental first steps, I expect to see some immediate results. Patience is not my virtue. If I’ve finally screwed up my courage to charge at that mountain, I expect that thing to move at least a couple of feet. NOW!

But it doesn’t quite work that way. Despite what some positivity gurus tell you about how you can think good thoughts and good things will come quickly, it’s not quite as easy as rubbing the lamp, making three wishes, and getting immediate results. Some work is involved … and some waiting, too. And as Tom Petty once sang, “the waiting is the hardest part.” The best way to handle it: by moving on to the next task.

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What happens when you have a big dream but no education or experience to support it? Does that mean you have to give up your ambitions—or at least put them on hold until you can collect the prerequisites?

Not necessarily. How’s your supply of chutzpah?

Edith Head was an educated woman. She had a B.A. in French from the University of California at Berkeley and an M.A. in Romance Languages from Stanford. But she didn’t have the education necessary to get the job she really wanted.

So it’s a good thing she had all the nerve in the world.  Read the rest of this entry »