My Pity Parties don’t occur when there’s really something to be upset about. No, during real crises, I’m usually too busy working the problem to have time for a Pity Party. I throw my best celebrations of misery when there’s nothing tangible to upset me. I throw them over the small things, the minor inconveniences and everyday disappointments that plague everyone.

So once a Pity Party begins, how can you turn out the lights and put yourself back into a rose-colored frame of mind? Try counting your blessings.

Sit down with a notebook and pen, and start writing a numbered list of all the good things in your life. List every person who brings you joy or makes the burdens of your life easier to bear. List your job and every financial advantage that helps you keep going. List your home, car, computer, your pets, favorite sports teams, beloved fishing boat, girl’s- or boy’s-night-out gang—all the things that make you happy. The more time you spend thinking about the positive things in your life, the less time you’ll have to obsess over the negatives. Here’s more inspiration to help you be thankful:

“Reflect on your present blessings, of which every man has many; not on your past misfortunes, of which all men have some.”

—Charles Dickens, novelist

“Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.”

—Melody Beattie, self-help author

“We should give our low points, as well as high points, a meaning, let the seasons of our life naturally progress, and be thankful for them. There is a purpose for everything.”

—Kent Thune, financial advisor

“Rest and be thankful.”

—Inscription on a stone seat atop a Scotland Highland

“Count your blessings. Once you realize how valuable you are and how much you have going for you, the smiles will return, the sun will break out, the music will play, and you will finally be able to move forward with the life that God intended for you with grace, strength, courage, and confidence.”

—Og Mandino, sales guru

“I awoke this morning with devout thanksgiving for my friends, the old and the new.”

—Ralph Waldo Emerson, essayist and philosopher

“Appreciation can make a day, even change a life. Your willingness to put it into words is all that is necessary.”

—Margaret Cousins, writer/editor

“For all that has been, thanks. For all that will be, yes.”

—Dag Hammarskjold, Secretary General of the United Nations