Posts Tagged ‘Self-Improvement’

See it? Over there, floating in the air just … out … of … your … reach. In your mind’s eye, you stretch out your fingers … so close. Maybe if you get to your feet! Yes, that will do it! The simple act of standing will bridge the distance, allowing your brain to latch onto the elusive idea floating just outside its grasp.

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When Mr. Utterson thought of his old friend Harry Jekyll, he pictured a smooth, jovial face that radiated kindness. But when he looked into the pale face and displeasing smile of the mysterious Edward Hyde, he saw “a sort of murderous mixture of timidity and boldness.” As he warned Jekyll, “if ever I read Satan’s signature on a face, it is on that of your new friend.”

But as anyone who’s read Robert Louis Stevenson’s classic novella or seen one of the many film adaptations knows, Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde were one in the same.

We may never have kept company with physicians who experimented on themselves with strange potions, but we’ve probably all known at least one person who seemed to have dramatically different personalities depending on the cycle of the moon or which way the wind was blowing. And with all the stresses we’re under these days, it’s just possible we sometimes give off a little Jekyll-and-Hyde vibe ourselves.

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Have you ever taken a trip thinking you’d planned everything perfectly only to discover you’d forgotten something critical, such as reservations or directions? In a way, that’s what happened to Dr. Norman E. Thagard.

It was the summer of 1995, and in the 34 years since the Soviets first blasted off Yuri Gagarin, more than 300 American and Russian astronauts had totaled 38 years in space. Finally, the two Super Powers had arranged for their space travelers to spend some quality time together. Thagard would join two Russians for four months aboard the space station Mir. It would be the longest space trip ever undertaken by an American.

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All three of my cancer diagnoses involved multiple surgeries and treatments initiated in rapid succession. Because of previous health issues, I was used to asking doctors questions, taking notes, making sure to get a clear understanding of what to expect during and after procedures. But the information is only as good as the doctor doling it out. And while most of my doctors have been blessings, a couple were not.

One had the bedside manner of a slab of marble. He resented questions and answered in monosyllables … if he answered at all. He responded to my inquiry about a complicated surgery with a short video. The production, with its idealized cartoon renderings, failed to mention the potential circulatory complications, long-term back issues, and other serious risks common to the procedure. Those I discovered only after suffering major complications that took three years and several operations to correct. So I was surprised after leaving Dr. Marble to discover he’d noted in my medical records that he went over those complications with me in detail prior to surgery. Had that been true, I might have taken a different path.

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Like many of you, I’ve got too much on my mind lately and the mental noise is overwhelming the part of my brain that tracks everyday chores, appointments, and so on. As a result, I’m skipping meals, going to bed at ridiculous hours, putting off easy tasks that would be better put away, and even missing appointments that were marked on my calendar.

Time for the timers.

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Music has charms to soothe a savage breast, to soften rocks, or bend a knotted oak.

English poet and playwright William Congreve penned this famous and often misquoted line for his tragedy, The Mourning Bride. That was in 1697 … centuries before anyone conceived of a phonograph, radio, or MP3. But even then people recognized the tremendous influence music could have on human emotions.

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It’s a fall Saturday and in the United States that means a day of college football. I’m a devotee of American football, both the college game and the NFL. This weekend, both my teams are coming off losses—and it hasn’t been a terrific week for me, either. So I can’t help wondering how all of us are going to meet the challenge of regrouping.

I tend to spend a lot of time rehashing my mistakes and contemplating how I could have done things differently. But top-flight athletes understand that what’s done is done. In order to reach the pinnacle of the amateur or professional ranks, they must be able to walk away from their failures … to live in the moment.

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A group of us were sitting around having a good laugh when three disembodied heads flew past the front window in quick succession.

“Did you see that?” I asked.

“The Segways,” someone replied. “They rent them downtown.”

Ohhhh, the Segways. Well, it was just a bit early for Halloween.

A Segway is a two-wheeled, self-balancing motorized vehicle that can transport a single rider in a standing position at speeds up to about 12 mph. Though I’ve never had the pleasure, they look like an absolute blast to ride. But as I watched the Segways roll by and considered the motorized carts supplied by most stores and the ubiquitous ads for motorized chairs, I couldn’t help wondering if humans are unlearning how to walk … and what consequences that might have.

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Look at the bright side … this too shall pass … keep the faith.

I write a lot of articles about hanging in when life gets tough. Endurance is a gift. If you can just will yourself to outlast the pain, heartache, discouragement, loneliness, confusion, and grief life throws your way, eventually things will get better. Where there is life, there is hope.

Several years ago, I worked with a woman in her 40s who’d always wanted to find her soul mate. She finally met “Mr. Right,” the two were engaged to marry and planning their wedding … when she was diagnosed with terminal cancer. He left her to fight her cancer battle and die alone. A few days ago I learned of a similar situation, and it brought home the reality that some mountains cannot be moved and cannot be scaled. And some things will not get better in this lifetime. So how can you find comfort when all really is lost?

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As my friends know well, I’m a passionate person. Fortunately, though, I have a wide practical streak that helps me hold my passions in check and keeps me from cutting off my nose to spite my face. That practicality is a gift from both parents, but it usually speaks to me in the voice of Star Trek’s Mr. Spock, quoting a favorite line from the film The Wrath of Khan: “You must learn to govern your passions; they will be your undoing.“

As a reporter for the Washington Post, Carl Bernstein occasionally let passion get the best of him, too. According to author Stephen Bates in his book If No News, Send Rumors, Bernstein dreamed of being the paper’s full-time rock critic. And executive editor Ben Bradlee promised him the job … before giving it to someone else.

Furious, Bernstein decided to quit the job he’d held since 1966. But his inner Spock must have had a word because he didn’t just storm out the door. Instead he quietly applied for Hunter S. Thompson’s recently vacated postion as political writer for Rolling Stone.

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