Britain’s official royal poet was in a bit of a snit. Sir John Betjeman had been asked to pen a verse for Queen Elizabeth’s 1977 Silver Jubilee. And the usually good-humored 70-year-old Poet Laureate was not pleased with the response. Among other criticism, Conservative MP Nicholas Fairbairn had called Betjeman’s patriotic work “banal.”

After the poet left in a huff, his agent explained to reporters, “He is very upset that it is being treated as a poem when in fact it was never intended to be. It is a hymn.”

Whatever literary critics and politicians thought, when Betjeman’s “hymn”—sung to a composition by Malcolm Williamson, Master of the Queen’s Music—premiered later at London’s Royal Albert Hall, it was greeted by long and thunderous applause. Clearly the public overruled the critics.

But since few of us will receive that kind of comforting vindication, here are a few suggestions for how we can handle criticism without embarrassing ourselves:

• Don’t be surprised.   My nine-year-old nephew recently told me he doesn’t like programs, such as American Idol, where the judges are “mean” to the contestants. I explained that if those contestants took the usual route to a music career, they’d experience much more criticism and rejection than they encounter in those brief moments before their television judges. Criticism is part of the learning experience in any endeavor. You’ll be better able to handle occasional negative feedback if you accept that it’s inevitable and can help you improve.

• Don’t lash out.   Not long ago I was scanning the comments attached to a negative book review on Amazon.com. The book’s author had chimed in to refute the reviewer’s poor opinion of his work. Bad idea. The review was tedious and off point. Even so, when the author objected, a chorus of commenters berated him for being thin-skinned and concluded he wouldn’t have challenged the review if there weren’t truth to it. No matter how justified you are in lashing out at unfair criticism, often the only thing you accomplish is to lend it credence.

• Don’t berate yourself.   Okay, so you’ve received some negative feedback. What do you say? A simple “thank you” is fine. Tell your critics you appreciate their opinion and will give it some thought. But do not immediately apologize for your stupidity or begin to berate yourself for not doing a better job. What if the next person liked your approach? Will you change your mind again and decide it was wonderful after all? Give yourself time to evaluate criticism and consider its value. Just because someone provides feedback doesn’t mean it’s accurate or right for you. And even if you decide your work could improve, that’s no reason to beat up on yourself for how you did things the first time around. Even Shakespeare had a learning curve.